1. Don’t focus on right now.
Teenagers have a bad habit (I know I did) of assuming that the way things are now are the way they are going to be indefinitely. Cant find part-time work and are literally down to your last $20? Guess I will always be struggling. Boyfriend or girlfriend broke up with you? I’m just meant to be single forever. How things are now, at this present moment, are not an indicator of the gifts that you will possess one day.Your life will change, your life will get better so no need to focus solely on how “bad” things are now. You will find work, you will meet other people. Nothing stays the same, your life included.
2. Spend time with your family.
When I was growing up my family were these people I saw everyday but felt little real connection to. I didn’t think they understood me nor I them. Of course I would learn much later in my life that those people who I felt such a lack of closeness with would be the ones who would be there for me when everybody else would bow out. They would be my very generous landlords (who didn’t ask for rent) and the only people in my entire existence who never forgot a single birthday. Don’t do as I did and wait till you are older to appreciate your family. Years from now you will look back and realize that of almost all the people you knew as a teenager, chances are, your family will be the ones that are still around. True story.
3. Focus on school.
I’ve always been a big advocate for back up plans. You know, just in case life throws you a curve ball and you find yourself on the brink of a midlife crisis and that dream job you now want requires a high school diploma or even some college credentials. As a teenager I had a lot of friends who just wanted to spend all their time playing guitar and I encouraged them to do so. Want to be a rockstar by the age of 30, sounds awesome but you know what else is awesome: having something to fall back on just in case (just in case). Besides, any girl will agree that a musician who finishes a stellar show but can then turn around and discuss neo-Marxism is never going home alone, like ever.
4. Volunteer somewhere different every year.
As a teenager, volunteering (see: working for free) seemed like such a waste of my time. Why would I devote my precious time and not be compensated for it, is the tune I sang. Little did I know that if I contributed just one day per week (a measly 5 hours) starting at 16, by the time I turned 25 I would have accomplished an approximate total of 2,340 volunteer hours. Now, that’s impressive. To yourself, to your community and anybody who will ever look at your resume.
5. Get offline.
As somebody who spent many hours of their life on ICQ and MSN Messenger (What, it was the early 2000s) I will be the first to admit that in the time I spent chatting with randoms from Alberta, I could have learned a new language, done better in high school and enjoyed the summers of 2001-2003 just a little more (Ahh, sunshine on my face versus me holed up in my room chatting at 3 am like my life depended on it). Get offline, kids, like now.
6. Know who your real friends are and invest your time in
them.
I cant help but feel that when we are really young our main concern (whether we care to admit it or not) is to be liked by those around us. As we get older we realize that very few people are actually worthy of us trying so hard. You are allowed to have a few party friends who you merely drink and have light and casual conversations with but precious time should really be allocated to those you know you can call at 3 in the morning at a time of crisis. Those people are few and far between so make sure you invest your time in them properly.
7. Do not surround yourself with only people who dress like
you, listen to the same music as you and like the same things as you.
Do you ever walk by a group of friends and they all look and sound the same? I have and I swore that will never be me again. If you surround yourself with a multifaceted collection of people of all walks of life you will never become complacent. You will also never succumb to the proverbial comfort zone but rather continually experience new and different tastes, hobbies and ways of life you may have never gravitated towards on your own.
8. Start journaling.
I have said it before and I will say it again, physically writing out your thoughts, feelings and grievances is the cheapest and most healthiest form of therapy there is. Also, it does wonders for your verbal and written skills. I have always written, even as a teenager but I definitely wish I explored creative writing on a more professional level way younger. Besides, how much of a trip will it be to read something you wrote ten years.
9. Do not chase boys, or girls.
If I had a teenage brother or sister I would tell them, “Don’t date, just focus on yourself” but much like I didn’t listen to my mother, they probably wouldn’t listen to me either. Personally, I blame hormones. Besides, what do teenagers know about relationships and how to sustain one? Use this time to build a life for yourself, to establish the kind of person you want to be in 5 years, not chase boys or girls. I know, much easier said than done.
10. Very few things in your life will make or break you.
The truth is, whatever is going in your life right now, at this moment, whoever it is that is disturbing your peace, chances are will all be afterthoughts in a few years. Difficult situations and problems you may have with people presently do not make or break your life, no matter how much you feel they do. You, make or break your life, everything else can be mended, changed for the better and forgotten about altogether.
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